2019 all was good, I was ticking along very well at the age of 52 very comfortably, and had little need for medical attention. I was eating whatever I wanted, although mostly nutrient dense foods and healthy fats. I was consuming beer in the evenings. I also was working out regularly and very active in recreational sports.
2020 things started to change when I came down with a strange illness toward the end of March after having been to pickleball camp in Florida. I assumed it was COVID since that was obviously going around at the time. I didn’t get a test as they were not available in early 2020. Lockdown came and I was bed ridden with a 100.4° fever. I know it doesn’t sound like much, but for me, it was big fever which I had not experienced in perhaps a decade. After recovering from that which took a solid ten days, I was suffering a minor toe irritation in my left foot, I assumed it was COVID toe because it seemed like that was going around, and it matched my symptoms. Continuing with pickleball and other activities, I started to notice that my left big toe was becoming discolored, and irritated. This was gradual, and only slightly annoying until…
Later in the summer, my big toe started to cause pain at nighttime, and I would wake up in the middle of the night in agony. The only way I could eleviate the pain would be to hold my toe, or shake the limb vigorously. It seemed to be a circulation thing, however, the pain would go as quickly as it would arrive, then shoot back at some point during the night, or perhaps not until the next evening. I was reluctant to go to my doctor, I really didn’t have a primary care at the time, having not needed one in decades literally. For treatment, I was getting sun, and reducing activities, elevating, but nothing really helped, and I started to lose sleep as a result of the pain. I was taking over the counter pain relief. The pain was getting more and more intense, and the discoloration was maroon, borderline purple.
I had been advised several times by friends and family to go to see a medical professional, and I finally went to the AFC Urgent Care October 20, 2020. This was rather unhelpful as they had no idea what was going on with my toe, they said it looked like a circulation issue, prescribed Tylenol with Codeine, and sent me home. They had two doctors look, and they both said almost in unison, “if it gets any worse, do not come back here, go to the Emergency Room”. I cried.
The meds helped get a little sleep, but the pain was still off the charts. I had been reading the Blood Code book by Richard Maurer in the meantime and decided to reach out to him to see about getting in to see him. He had suggested a blood panel and to come in and see him. I was reluctant to mention my toe at the time optimistically thinking it would be clear by the time I saw him, as if. I had the bloodwork drawn and received the results, and there were no stand outs. When I went to see Dr. Richard Maurer for my first visit, we reviewed the bloodwork, and I asked him to take a look at my toe. He looked and said he was sure it was gout.
The diagnosis was surprising since it had not dawned on me before that it could have been gout. My dad had had awful gout, and so it sort of made sense that I would have it too, especially given my taste for beer and charcuterie, and my sister had had some gout symptoms as well. The diagnosis at the time was actually somewhat of a relief since it seemed like an easier fix than say a circulation issue. I did not want to take any pharmaceutical meds for it however, and decided to reduce beer, reduce charcuterie and red meat. I also reduced pork and coconut on the doctor’s recommendation. He also had me on an insane amount of supplements, and we ordered more bloodwork.
Then, one day in late November 2020, I was was soaking in the bathtub when the odd horrific feeling ”jumped” to my fourth toe. My big toe was actually starting to show signs of improvement, but the fourth toe on the left foot which had been uneffected was suddenly purple, and in agony. The feeling was like someone was crushing my toe, but then it would just lift. My partner was unable to sleep in the same room with me, as I was either writhing in pain holding my foot and toe, or shaking my foot, or trying to get fitful sleep which for some reason would not come until after 3:30am. He moved to the guest room for at least six weeks in order to get his own sleep.
Meanwhile, I received my second blood panel results and reviewed them with Richard Maurer on 12-1-2020. Interestingly enough, the marker for gout was negative. He said the big toe was improved, and he was not sure why, and then went on to diagnose my fourth toe as an ingrown nail quite confidently. He then prescribed some more supplements, and referred me to a pedriatrist. He even recommended Portland Foot and Ankle, claiming it is an easy fix and I will be pain free in 72 hours. He then said and I quote: ”come back when you are better”. And I had thought doctors were supposed to help us heal…
I went for my first visit to Portland Foot and Ankle on 12-7-2020. I was Xrayed and escorted to a office where I was given numbing injections in my foot. It was the most amazing feeling to have the pain gone albeit temporary! The doctor there probed around my fourth toe nail rather unsympathetically. She looked at me while holding a scalpel to my fourth toenail and said ”it feels like it is going to go” I said, OK, having no idea if that was a question, or what she was trying to say. She then proceeded to tear the nail off the toe, and put me in a surgery boot to walk around. I was told, it may get better in three days, or may not, and that there may be some circulation issues going on. I was also prescribed more Tylenol with Codeine, and scheduled for a follow up in Jan 2021. Total for Dr. Maurer $539, not including all the bloodwork, the book, and all the wasted supplements, two incorrect diagnoses. No mention of my walking gait with regards to a toe injury or PT recommendation.
After the three days, the pain was much worse and the toe was so completly discolored that it was a bit alarming. I could not walk, and was in extreme pain at random times mostly at night. The whole foot was getting numb especially the first and fourth toes, and the outside of the foot was numb to the touch. All the left toes were sensitive to hot and cold. The fourth toe started to feel sort of ”dead” is the only way I can describe it. Yes, completly horrific, and no idea what happened, or why.
I spoke with the Portland Foot and Ankle doctor who had provided service, and moved up my next visit to 12-21-2020. When I went to that appointment, I was a little scared of what was happening with my toe. I had thought optimistically that it would have improved after the nail was torn off, but instead, it was way worse. The pain was unbelievably intense and did not let up. I was put on more pain meds on 12-21, the same Tylenol with Codeine which sort of took some of the edge off. Other than that, the doctor was really no help, and told me literally that I may lose my toe. She also referred me to a vascular specialist since she thought it was a vascular issue. Grand total for Portland Foot and Ankle: $431. Absolutely no advise given in the two visits with regards to walking gait, or PT recommendation.
12-22-2020 I go to Advanced Vein Center. I met with Dr. Abrahamsen who was very sympathetic and experienced. He diagnosed: ”wound of toes” and “ulcer of left 4th toe.” I was prescribed about a gallon of burn cream, silver sulfdiazine, and told to not ski the whole season. I cried. They said I had Peripheral Vascular Disease, Abscess of Foot, Ulcer, and Ischemic Infraction of Muscle, all active. He did tell me something that was very helpful in my future rabbit hole research: Hydrobaric therapy he said would be very beneficial, although perhaps unavailable. Advanced Vein Center total: $330. I asked the doctor if he thought acupuncture might help. He said “no, unfortunately, it does not help in cases like this.” No mention of PT or walking gait as a result of a severe toe wound.
Frustrated, and not having anywhere to turn, I decided to reach out to another ND who was recommended to me in Connecticut. She was available for Zoom medical consults.
12-28-2020 first medical consult with Hannah Gale ND. She basically dianosed me with COVID toe and put me on a shit ton of expensive prescription supplements through Fullscript. She also recommended acupunture which was a huge blessing. The supplements, and diagnosis, not so much. The two consults, and all the supplements for COVID toe $584. I stopped going to her. The acupuncture was a huge help however, and I do thank her for recommending that. Why I didn’t just follow my intuition previously about acupuncture a mystery. The COVID toe diagnosis was unhelpful, the supplements did nothing. She also advised me to do hot soaks for 3 minutes and ice for 30 seconds or something. Whatever it was, I tried it, and the pain was so unbelievably intense that I almost fainted. I tried a couple more times, and decided that there was absolutely no way that that could be beneficial in any way. The horrific part was that something inside was telling me I need to continue the hot cold therapy, even though it was creating agony.
12-30-2020 My initial visit with Jason of Downeast Acupuncture. It was so refreshing to have someone with more of an easter medical background to take a look at what was going on with my foot and toes. The first session was amazing because it was the first time since I had been numbed that day at the foot doctor that I could feel no pain in my toe. Jason also told me to heal I would need to adjust my attitude. He was basically telling me, I learned later, that I needed to get unstuck from my pain body. He didn’t use that term, it is the term Elaine Day McKusick uses from her wonderful book mentioned here in Five minute pineal gland orientation mini guided meditation. Jason also advised me thankfully to quit the burn cream which I had been using, and to quit the hot/cold therapy soaks as that is not helping!
2021
Acupuncture contiued once or twice a week for the next several months and was extremely beneficial to my overall healing. I pretty much hit rock bottom on January 7, 2021, the day after the insurrection. I had a horrific panic attack, and not knowing what it was, my sister and partner were both very concerned. The pain in my chest was excruciating, and I was was totally uncomfortable with brutal anxiety and racing pulse rate. I was advised by family and friends to go to the ER, but I was reluctant, knowing it wasn’t a heart attack intuitively, and thinking it may be panic related. The audio from the insurrection clips on the news was making me extremely anxious and uncomfortable. Fortunately, I had an acupuncture appointment for that morning, and when I called to check in with them, and perhaps cancel, Cara at Downeast Acupuncture said to definitely come in, do not go to the ER. They would get me calm, and check my stats.
What a relief, when I arrived, Cara gave me a meditation and breathing technique, and just made me feel at ease. They took my stats and said yes everything was racing and that I had had a brutal panic attack. Jason put needles in my ear, and I was in heaven for the session and came out as a new person. Thank you so much Downeast Acupuncture! I texted the above photo to my loved ones who were quite concerned since seeing me in the morning and thinking I was having a heart event. I didn’t get any treatment on my left foot that day, I remember I didn’t even take my socks off, but what an amazing feeling when I could take a deep breath and relax!
Acupuncture was a godsend, and I continued for the rest of the year, although I did take a break over the summer as I was out of the area. I had started to see
Early May 2021, I started to see Dr. Benjamin Hagopian of Maine Integrative Family Care. My first appointment with him was May 5. He said there was definite irritation in the toes, possibly vascular, although he was somewhat skeptical about the vascular possibility since it was only in the left side. The fungal sample came out negative, blood pressure was fine. A later appointment in August, the toe was better, but I had some severe tennis elbow symptoms in the left elbow. Then in October, I went in to the next appointment with severe calf pain. This, I found out later was a result of the toe pain causing an irregular gait. Unfortunately, Dr. Ben did not realize the severity of the irregular gait, and diagnosed me with “calf strain”. Now he also dianosed my left foot with CRPS. CRPS stands for complex regional pain syndrome. Although this diagnosis was somewhat vague, I was blessed with a referral to a physical therapist. I wish I had gone to PT much earlier, however, I was really unaware of the imbalance in my gait. I pretty much quit going to Dr. Ben at this point, but did start the PT on his recommendation. The main reason I decided to discontinue with Dr. Ben is because I had been reading the wonderful book Heal Yourself with Ozone by Paula Horan which is helpful on so many levels. I really thought it would be beneficial for my PCP to educate himself with regards to so much of the information in the book, not only for his patients, but for his family as well. He responded with an incredibly blunt email that he does not have time to read anything other than what he has to read, meaning from what I can gather, from the pharmeuceutical industry! Thankfully, I cut my ties with Dr. Ben as a result. I do question how he can call his practice “integrative” after that brief exchange. He also had told me at age 54 that I may just have to live like this for the rest of my life. As if!
My physical therapist was incredibly helpful. By the time I went in for my initial visit with him, October 21, 2021, I was having a real hard time getting around due to the intense calf pain. I could literally not walk comfortably, yet alone workout, or any other activity without intense cramping pain, almost like shin splints but all over the left calf. I was thankfully referred to Jeffrey Thibodeau, DPT, CMP of Saco Bay PT here in South Portland. He had me walk and observed my gait, which was a first in the entire saga up until this point. He then said I am severely out of alignment with regards to my walking gait, and that he would need to measure my calfs to compare the size. Sure enough, the left calf measured literally 1/2” in circumference from the right calf. This may not sound like a lot, but it is. He diagnosed my with atrophy in my left calf, despite Dr. Ben’s diagnosis of ”stained calf muscle”. He did agree with Dr. Ben with regards to the CRPS diagnosis, and gave me some exercises to work on that. There was incredible cold sensitivity in the left toes still, and a sense of numbness in the toes and posterior part of the foot. One thing that was interesting other than the exercises was the rice/beans bucket. He had me take a bucket and fill it with dry rice and lentil beans, and wiggle my left foot inside the bucket with various movements. This seemed to address the exasperating CRPS symptoms, but the sensation on the toes and bottom of feet was incredibly intense. Not pain, but rather, numbness and cold sensitivity which very gradually reduced. I continued once weekly PT sessions for six weeks. During this time I was treated with many different techniques including massage, cupping, balance exercises and more. Very early in the sessions, I developed excruciating sciatica pain which I as able to counter with a lot of bird-dog type exercises. I also started doing a little pilates at home with the Apple Fitness app. Jeffrey also had mentioned dry brushing, but we didn’t get that far, I tried it on my own later. He also recommended a massage therapist which I went to and she discovered that my spine was way out of alignment, and that was confirmed by Jeffrey Thibodeau in a later PT session.
December 1, 2021, I went to Florida for vacation. It was amazing to be in the sun and get all the benefits of the beach walks. The first day I arrived in Florida, I walked on the beach barefoot for as much as I could about a city block, and although it was beneficial, the pain was intense mostly in the left calf, but also the cold sensitivity when I dipped my feet in the ocean was incredibly intense. I was hoping to wing foil while there, so I had to work through all the trauma. Gradually, I increased the beach walking and eventually after a whole week, I was able to comfortaby walk two miles on the beach and the cold sensitivity was somewhat reduced. I even started wing foiling which was my goal, and it made me very happy to have success, learning to ride! There was still a lot of pain in the calf, especially with longer walks and/or board riding.
Returning back to Maine, I had my last visit with Jeffrey Thibadeau on 12-21-21. He recommended at the time to get an MRI and perhaps back surgery for my back alignment issue. When I asked what that would determine, he said it could be L7 disc, and that surgery may be required. This was not an option for me, so I decided to go on my own and heal myself outside of the western medical paradigm.
Reading more and more of the Heal yourself with Ozone book by Paula Horan, see also: HigherDOSE PEMF GO Mat video review and demonstration, I learned so much about various therapies including ozone saunas. I found a naturapathic center in Waterville which provides many therapies. Yes Waterville is over 90 miles away, but that did not stop me from going, especially since there was also a red light therapy sauna in Waterville which became my new home away from home! I felt immediate results from my first ozone sauna session. It is a unique experience inside a ”Russian sauna” which is more like a capsule with your head outside the sauna. A trained tech wraps a towel around your neck to prevent the ozone from escaping since it is irritating to the lungs if inhaled directly. The tech then releases ozone gas into the sauna, queues up Netflix on the screen if you want, and you chill for 30 minutes with the ozone in concentration contacting your entire body.
The red light therapy sauna was another first for me. I had been reading about the oxydative benefits of red light therapy, and decided to try it. The closest sauna was at the time also in Wateville of all places. I went and enjoyed a 45 minute sauna which also included a massage chair as well as a life cycle.
The results from these two initial treatments were so intense and welcome that I continued various other treatments, and continue now with at home treatments as well as constatly being on the lookout for other new biohacks such as Reiki, Biofield Tuning, breathing techniques, meditation, PEMF mats, crystal therapy, and light body activation. In the process, I learned that we are all healers, and we can all learn the techniques to not only heal ourselves, but also heal those around us. It is an incredibly powerful realization that there exists this potential in us. It is also another example if fractals, when you turn your attention, and really look inside something, it opens up another whole world, and again and again until infinity.
I do thank all my teachers in various martial arts and other mind body activities thoughout my life. I have always been drawn to these modalities, especially yoga, tai chi and xi gongue, but also percussion, singing and music making. I definitely think that the breathing techniques and meditative qualities practiced in these modalities provide the framework for getting into the theta brainwave. Theta brainwave helps me to open up my mind to these subtle energies for lack of a better term.